BTW, the newet bar end shifter I have on hand is from my '08 Speed, and it still works just fine. Even the ones on Holey Spokes are the original ones, and they have been drilled into oblivion, but still work just fine. I also ride just like John does, with my hand mostly around the shifter and just a part of the top of the handlebar, but I don't find that I put that much force on that shifter during turns, or it would tend to make it shift! That force would also not affect the detent plate that keeps breaking. If it did, then you would also be experiencing unwanted shifting first! The detent plate doesn't take any of the force from your hand until you want to shift.
I think you will find that the ones that are breaking were sold sometime in 2009 or 2010. Hmmm! Didn't Shimano introduced the new 10 speed equipment in 2009? Maybe they made some dimensional changes to the parts in all of their bar ends when they started making 10 speed shifters.